A tale in 3 parts
So, you’re working at the coffee shop at the corner of University and somewhere, and you’re thinking you should’ve stayed in school. There’s an unkempt hairy person trying to make small talk from across the counter, and you know they’re trying weasel you into a date. You’re desperate for an intrusion, and as luck would have it, the androgynous advertisement flyer person bursts in. Black lipstick. Strategically zippered, ripped black clothing, augmented discretely with fine-link silver chains, strategically disheveled black hair half-covering various piercings. They plunk the weekly flyers on the counter. You notice the flyers have a prominent “Green” notice saying, “Printed on 70 lb. uncoated, 100% recycled paper.” To avoid the teetotaler, you grab a flyer and begin reading;
You can change your life! Count Alessandro di Cagliostro has discovered a profound secret. Yes! For three easy-to-manage payments of only 19.99, learn how you can re-write the script of your own life! Transform your humdrum existence into a dizzying buzz of delight! How? Simply apply the rhetorical techniques of great fiction to your daily activities! Count Cagliostro will show you how. Just by reading this, your transformative journey has begun!
published in Ottawa by above/ground press
as the fifteenth title in above/ground’s prose/naut imprint
a/g subscribers receive a complimentary copy
Karl Jirgens, is the former English Department Head, and former Chair of the Creative Writing Program at the University of Windsor. He is the author of two short story collections (Coach House, and Mercury Presses), and two scholarly books (ECW Press). He edited two books (one on painter Jack Bush (Coach House), and another on poet Christopher Dewdney (Wilfrid Laurier UP), plus, an issue of Open Letter magazine (with Beatriz Hausner). His scholarly and creative works are published globally. Jirgens edited and published Rampike, an international journal of art, writing, and theory (1979-2016). Rampike is now digitally archived (free) through the portal at U Windsor’s Leddy Library. WEB: https://scholar.uwindsor.ca/rampike/about.html (Non-profit). All copyrights remain with the contributors.
Karl Jirgens’ next short-fiction collection, The Razor’s Edge is due spring of 2022 (Porcupine’s Quill)
To order, send cheques (add $1 for postage; in US, add $2; outside North America, add $5) to: rob mclennan, 2423 Alta Vista Drive, Ottawa ON K1H 7M9. E-transfer or PayPal at rob_mclennan (at) hotmail.com or the PayPal button at www.robmclennan.blogspot.com